Being alone allows the memes to run rampant in the mind.
Many of them are recursive and can take over the mind. Memes often cause actions which cause more exposure to them.
The best way out of this loop is to stay in communication with others, mass exposure, or do some sort of volunteer work or charity... Typically that breaks self-destructive patterns.
"[Michelle] That's right, and also I know several American men who have no respect for other American men who look to "foreign" women exclusively: they feel they must be too weak to handle an empowered woman. It's the "easy route". I know that my own social bias is that if I see an American man with, say, an Asian woman, I assume that he must be a loser who can't take care of himself, given the often-correct reputation that Asian women are more submissive and coddling.
"It's also interesting to note that many black Americans complain of black men seeking white women for the same reason - that they/we demand less and aren't as vocal or sassy as black women."
Hey, now, let's remember the fact that at least some men, myself included, find Asian and Caucasian women in general more physically attractive than Africans. Perhaps this applies to African men also. Perhaps Asian females as a class are just more attractive than Caucasians, who are in turn more attractive than Africans, on an absolute scale. I bet nobody was willing to consider that.
I expect to catch flak for that, but I believe it's worthy of consideration regardless of how much some hope it's not true.
....yes, i'm sorry. i actually thought of mentioning this after writing that bit, but i hoped it would go without saying. regardless, the exceptions do exist, and virus is one place rich in exceptions=) so i would actually assume the opposite for our little crowd. i didnt mean to sound so rough.
Sebby, I feel defensive when I read your comments about how demanding American women are, seeing as I am one and stuff. I guess I wouldn't argue with a statement that started like "a lot of..." but a generalization that seems to imply "all" irks me. I have one husband and three Other Significants, and they've all said I'm fairly low-maintenance. Of course, I recognize that the content of the previous sentence already marks me as Not Typical. Still, I'd appreciate it if you'd consider phrasing statements from your experience as something like "All the American women I've gotten involved with romantically..." or something.
--Eva, being oh so demanding
PS: Alternatively, people can always take turns worshiping each other. That's fun too.
--- Dr Sebby <drsebby@hotmail.com> wrote: > ....Let me nip this in the bud. it's almost funny > that everyone jumps to > the cliche conclusion of the "passive and weak asian > woman, submissive, > quiet and cooperative". It's what i am accustomed > to hearing from american > women if i'm ever foolish enough to bring this > subject up. but this is NOT > what i was suggesting...in fact i cant stand women > like that, to the point > of being difficult to imagine even dating an asian > gal anywhere since they > almost always seem to be touched in some small way > with these traits. > please read my post accurately before suggesting > such things. > > ....my favorite girlfriend was a french lawyer who > was truly as empowered as > they come - i'm trying to reintroduce my original > point here; any > "empowerment" american women have is not the > problem, it's that all the > typical benefits of such empowerment are useless > when hitched with qualities > of unaccountability, selfishness, > self-righteousness, whininess, disloyalty > and the severly annoying and useless "princess > complex". in fact i dont > find american women very empowered at all compared > to europeans...or well > heeled brazilians(my initial point(note the lack of > mention of the asian > cliche woman(as was also lacking in my original > post))). > > ....there are very few katherine hepburns left in > this country. maybe it's > the media's fault, dunno. but I like to have a true > and equitable partner > in a woman, not someone aloof, whiny, and constantly > demanding that everyone > pretend she's some fallen princess angel and that i > should count my lucky > stars to be able to accomodate her every whim (or > else).
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...i dont know about that michelle. ive found it a common thing to hear from foreigners who have lived here for a long time, "american women are really really f------d in the head." and other such things. i dont mean to sound overly rude, i just didnt want to understate a true quote. it seems to me that in this country in particular, the man <-----> woman balance of common respect leans HEAVY in the favor of women...moreso than any other culture i've personally been exposed to. it has gotten to the point that if you take your average american guy, put him in a different culture and ask him to treat a girl decently...the kind of treatment that would have girls here saying, "can you believe, he did that???(or didnt do that)...oh, i will NEVER go out with him again"....and in the foreign culture, the girl will think he's being the gentleman of the decade.
...i say that american men have been trained, abused and punished to the brink of insanity, and that it's never enough for the typical american gal because she's become spoiled...in the truest sense of the word. so if i were one to generalize i would say, "if you want someone to love that will love you back, go outside of the border"...."if you want someone to love that can only love herself, then stay here".
Yes, the debate has moved beyond Sebby's dilemma or lack thereof and become rather general. I hope no one takes offence at any of these remarks and instead we continue to refine our perceptions.
There are bad traits endemic in every society, and the only thing that makes it spicy and different is NOT being from your partner's society. Otherwise, by definition, you're going to run into the same old issues.
--- Dr Sebby <drsebby@hotmail.com> wrote: > ....yes, i'm sorry. i actually thought of > mentioning this after writing > that bit, but i hoped it would go without saying. > regardless, the > exceptions do exist, and virus is one place rich in > exceptions=) so i would > actually assume the opposite for our little crowd. > i didnt mean to sound so > rough.
--- Dr Sebby <drsebby@hotmail.com> wrote: > ....thanks for the note dear jake. and i must say, > from what ive > experienced chickiewise, american women are the > absolute worst deal going as far as cost+compromise+inflexibility+dimwittedness+trustworthyness vs. demands upon you.
Women like that exist because they can.
Stop feeding into it.
Stop dating women like this and perhaps they will stop thinking they can get away with this behaviour.
--- Dr Sebby <drsebby@hotmail.com> wrote: > ....thanks for the note dear jake. and i must say, > from what ive > experienced chickiewise, american women are the > absolute worst deal going as far as cost+compromise+inflexibility+dimwittedness+trustworthyness vs. demands upon you.
Women like that exist because they can.
Stop feeding into it.
Stop dating women like this and perhaps they will stop thinking they can get away with this behaviour.
,..not to worry gabrielle. i have never fed this problem, as you put it. nice to see another lurker stopping by to say hi though =) are you currently in NYC? or just from there?
--- Dr Sebby <drsebby@hotmail.com> wrote: > ....thanks for the note dear jake. and i must say, > from what ive > experienced chickiewise, american women are the > absolute worst deal going as far as cost+compromise+inflexibility+dimwittedness+trustworthyness vs. demands upon you.
Women like that exist because they can.
Stop feeding into it.
Stop dating women like this and perhaps they will stop thinking they can get away with this behaviour.
> ,..not to worry gabrielle. i have never fed this > problem, as you put it.
Now if we can get everyone else on board . . .
> nice to see another lurker stopping by to say hi > though =) are you > currently in NYC? or just from there?
I just joined the list a few weeks ago - was getting a feel for the tone of things before injecting myself. Maybe you'll hear from me more now (much to your dismay).
I am currently in NYC, yes, since 1997. Also lived here in 1988/89 but moved to Los Angeles, and now I'm back. Every day this sub-freezing temperature continues I question that decision.
Ah well . . .:
"New York is an ugly city, a dirty city. Its climate is a scandal, its politics are used to frighten children, its traffic is madness, its competition is murderous. But there is one thing about it - once you have lived in New York and it has become your home, no place else is good enough. All of everything is concentrated here, population, theater, art, writing, publishing, importing, business, murder, mugging, luxury, poverty. It is all of everything. It goes all right. It is tireless and its air is charged with energy."
...yeah, i visited NYC for the first time a few months back...and i wasnt impressed. sure the weather stank, but i just couldnt get over the terrible traffic, the filth, the fear, and the outrageous prices(that really got me). for the money one spends to lead a miserable, desperate, cold and fearful life in a stinky den of desperation; you could lead a truly vibrant and sweet existence in any number of choice locales world wide.
> ,..not to worry gabrielle. i have never fed this > problem, as you put it.
Now if we can get everyone else on board . . .
> nice to see another lurker stopping by to say hi > though =) are you > currently in NYC? or just from there?
I just joined the list a few weeks ago - was getting a feel for the tone of things before injecting myself. Maybe you'll hear from me more now (much to your dismay).
I am currently in NYC, yes, since 1997. Also lived here in 1988/89 but moved to Los Angeles, and now I'm back. Every day this sub-freezing temperature continues I question that decision.
Ah well . . .:
"New York is an ugly city, a dirty city. Its climate is a scandal, its politics are used to frighten children, its traffic is madness, its competition is murderous. But there is one thing about it - once you have lived in New York and it has become your home, no place else is good enough. All of everything is concentrated here, population, theater, art, writing, publishing, importing, business, murder, mugging, luxury, poverty. It is all of everything. It goes all right. It is tireless and its air is charged with energy."
If you're ever in NYC again - any of you - email me. I've lived here for 11 years. I can show you why people love it here. --- To unsubscribe from the Virus list go to <http://www.lucifer.com/cgi-bin/virus-l>
...yeah i suppose i have an unfair and biased take on NYC. although the prices ARE quite ridiculous for what ya get...but markets are markets i suppose. i still say tokyo beats NY hands down in so many ways....but as far as western culture and centrification of such, i guess the two shall remain in seperate categories. as of late, i have been increasingly impressed with Seattle and its infrastructure as far as cities go. some city planners deserve some medals there....now if they could just control the rain into efficient tropical downpours of 30 min. or so.
If you're ever in NYC again - any of you - email me. I've lived here for 11 years. I can show you why people love it here. --- To unsubscribe from the Virus list go to <http://www.lucifer.com/cgi-bin/virus-l>
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