logo Welcome, Guest. Please Login or Register.
2023-03-27 02:59:16 CoV Wiki
Learn more about the Church of Virus
Home Help Search Login Register
News: Everyone into the pool! Now online... the VirusWiki.

  Church of Virus BBS
  Mailing List
  Virus 2006

  Good Grief!!
previous next
Pages: [1] Reply Notify of replies Send the topic Print 
   Author  Topic: Good Grief!!  (Read 2303 times)
Mermaid
Archon
****

Posts: 770
Reputation: 8.66
Rate Mermaid



Bite me!

View Profile
Good Grief!!
« on: 2006-07-11 12:19:47 »
Reply with quote

Let us call it what it really is..mutilation.

http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/health/5165118.stm

if one wants to control AIDS figures, convince people wear a condom, for fucksakes!
Report to moderator   Logged
Hermit
Archon
*****

Posts: 4274
Reputation: 8.96
Rate Hermit



Prime example of a practically perfect person

View Profile WWW
Re:Good Grief!!
« Reply #1 on: 2006-07-11 12:58:58 »
Reply with quote

This "study" appears as seriously flawed as other pro-mutilation papers I have seen. It seems that the proponents of genital mutilation suffer from logical challenges on a vast number of fronts.

[Hermit: The following was written before I read the study. As noted in the analysis, the claims of the study (unlike the way it has been reported in the press) are preliminary. "Their results are based on the findings of just one study (the Orange Farm trial), and it will be important to repeat the calculations when further studies have been completed." An examination of the study shows that no normalization was performed to deal with the potential (probable even) issues of sexual activity levels and the number of partners in the mutilated and control groups in the Orange Farm study, leaving this article of extremely questionable worth. At the very least, the impact of such variables must be evaluated, and preferably, should be controlled for if the study is to have any significance beyond mathematical masturbation. I suggest that the article was properly noted as preliminary by the reviewers, and it is the wider dissemination of this article in ways which appear to promote genital mutilation outside of the medical and research community (presumably by pro-mutilation advocates) which establishes bias. I have added replies in braces to my rhetorical questions below.]

For example, do the authors know that many African tribes do engage in genital mutilation? {After reading the article: Yes} Amongst them the Xhosa of South Africa.  {After reading the article: Not specifically mentioned}  I wonder how the authors would approach the fact that despite their policy of circumcision (at puberty), the Xhosa had the highest rate of HIV  of any South African tribe at least into the mid-1990s (Source: Personal communication with Dr Sidney Lachman (Author of "A Knowledge Base of Heterosexual HIV/AIDS as a Global Problem in the 21st Century", Pharmaceutical Society of Southern Africa, 1999))  {After reading the article: Not mentioned} ?

I wonder whether the authors ever heard of the Hippocratic Oath?  {After reading the article: Almost certainly} If so, do you think it still says, "First do no harm"  {After reading the article: It does} ? If so, have they satisfactorily addressed the (many) harms that circumcision implies  {After reading the article: Not at all} ? Not least that of a violent assault on children by those normally thought to have a duty of care towards them  {After reading the article: Not addressed} ? Versus the "harm" of wearing a condom  {After reading the article: Not mentioned} ? After all, the possessors of foreskins can protect them very effectively from the threat of HIV by wearing one of those little rubber things on the ends of their cocks (thank-you Monty Python)  {After reading the article: The authors know that condom use is increasing} .

Perhaps the authors would care to comment on the idea that we should perform radical masectomies on all girls before they reach puberty on the grounds that this would all but eliminate breast cancers. After all, breasts serve little more function than foreskins and seem to be much more dangerous to their owners - and breast cancer cannot be prevented by using a condom.

What do you estimate is the probability that those who wrote this report were not members of a minority group that encourages genital mutilation?  {After reading the article: Not apparent from the author's names} Would requesting this information about the authors be seen as "anti-semitic" {After reading the article: Probably}?
« Last Edit: 2006-07-11 14:47:22 by Hermit » Report to moderator   Logged

With or without religion, you would have good people doing good things and evil people doing evil things. But for good people to do evil things, that takes religion. - Steven Weinberg, 1999
Mermaid
Archon
****

Posts: 770
Reputation: 8.66
Rate Mermaid



Bite me!

View Profile
Re:Good Grief!!
« Reply #2 on: 2006-07-12 01:30:56 »
Reply with quote

i think the high xhosa aids numbers have something to do with thabo mbeki's highly dangerous views about aids and aids cures. and yea..they boys are regularly circumcised. which proves the point that circumcision doesnt really prevent hiv/aids transmission. what a bunch of morons!

it is also their general consensus that hiv/aids is more of a 'zulu problem'...being that the kwazulu-natal provice of sa have always led the figures when it comes to hiv/aids victims.
« Last Edit: 2006-07-12 01:32:09 by Mermaid » Report to moderator   Logged
Hermit
Archon
*****

Posts: 4274
Reputation: 8.96
Rate Hermit



Prime example of a practically perfect person

View Profile WWW
Re:Good Grief!!
« Reply #3 on: 2006-07-12 02:41:43 »
Reply with quote

[Mermaid] it is also their general consensus that hiv/aids is more of a 'zulu problem'...being that the kwazulu-natal provice of sa have always led the figures when it comes to hiv/aids victims.

[Hermit] Death certificates in South Africa, under both the old and "new" governments, do not show HIV/AIDS as a cause of death. They reflect the "actual" cause of cessation of vital functions, "congestive asphyxiation",  "cardiac arrest", "systematic failure consequent to carcinoma" etc. So infection rates cannot be inferred from death certificates, and indeed, hepatitis, tuberculosis and malaria generally do the killing. HIV/AIDS merely opens the door to these more traditional diseases. So how do we "know" about infection rates?

[Hermit] As in most of Africa, HIV/AIDS rates in South Africa correlate well with migrant labor statistics. There always were far more Xhosa migrant laborers on the South African mines than ever there were Zulus. So why the perception that Zulus lead incidence of HIV/AIDS? I suggest that the difference is in methodology rather than distributions. As always, different sampling results in  incomparable data.

[Hemit] In Kwazulu Natal (which never was a nominally independent, or actually impoverished "homeland") every woman, black, white, Indian or "other", booking into a maternity clinic, had a blood sample taken. From the mid 1980s until at least the mid 1990s, these samples were tested, more or less comprehensively, for diseases such as Syphilis, Gonorrhea, Aids, TB, and Hepatitis and epidemiological distributions calculated. The high percentage of Zulu mothers included in this study meant that the prevalence of HIV/AIDS in that community was well known.

[Hemit] The Xhosa areas, in the Transkei and Ciskei, were massively impoverished "independent" homelands, and testing for disease was not performed on any systematic basis for these areas except when fortunate patients were referred to Cape Provincial hospitals. This eliminated most terminal patients - and indeed, most blacks from the Cape and Eastern Cape - from showing up in the statistics. This resulted in the reporting of much lower HIV/AIDS prevalence in these areas, but only the statistically naive would suggest this implied that they were really, really healthy people! (Statistically naive would probably be a fair description of most South African politicians - old and "new").

[Hermit] Subsequent statistical sampling in the 1990s, of tissue samples taken from Eastern Cape postmortem specimens, suggested that the incidence of HIV/AIDS in the Xhosa community was significantly higher than that reflected by methodologically equivalent postmortem sampling in the Zulu community.

[Hermit] Unfortunately, the ANC has issues with these, and indeed, any HIV/AIDS studies. Researchers in the "new" South Africa know that scarce research funds can evaporate with startling rapidity when skeletons under the carpets are disturbed. As not infrequently reported in the scientific and medical communities, this has resulted in some seriously strange HIV/AIDS related disinformation being prevalent in South African circles. The idea that HIV/AIDS is largely a Zulu pandemic is just one of these strange distortions.
« Last Edit: 2006-07-12 14:23:27 by Hermit » Report to moderator   Logged

With or without religion, you would have good people doing good things and evil people doing evil things. But for good people to do evil things, that takes religion. - Steven Weinberg, 1999
Mermaid
Archon
****

Posts: 770
Reputation: 8.66
Rate Mermaid



Bite me!

View Profile
Re:Good Grief!!
« Reply #4 on: 2006-07-12 11:18:34 »
Reply with quote

it seems to be mbeki's contention that hiv/aids is a zulu affliction..it helps him spread his crackpot theories and 'cures'. i was merely pointing to that.
Report to moderator   Logged
Hermit
Archon
*****

Posts: 4274
Reputation: 8.96
Rate Hermit



Prime example of a practically perfect person

View Profile WWW
Re:Good Grief!!
« Reply #5 on: 2006-07-12 14:18:47 »
Reply with quote

[Mermaid] it seems to be mbeki's contention that hiv/aids is a zulu affliction..it helps him spread his crackpot theories and 'cures'. i was merely pointing to that.

[Hermit] Yes. The ANC is Xhosa and denial is a river in Africa.
« Last Edit: 2006-07-12 14:19:32 by Hermit » Report to moderator   Logged

With or without religion, you would have good people doing good things and evil people doing evil things. But for good people to do evil things, that takes religion. - Steven Weinberg, 1999
Mermaid
Archon
****

Posts: 770
Reputation: 8.66
Rate Mermaid



Bite me!

View Profile
Re:Good Grief!!
« Reply #6 on: 2006-08-16 11:04:38 »
Reply with quote

http://www.ynetnews.com/articles/0,7340,L-3291902,00.html >

Clinton: Circumcision - the answer to AIDS

Former US President says that the world needs to prepare to tackle the cultural taboos regarding circumcision

Former US President Bill Clinton called for the world to prepare to tackle the cultural taboos surrounding circumcision Tuesday if, as many expect, trials show that it protects men and the women they sleep with from AIDS.


In a speech to the International Aids conference in Toronto, Canada, Clinton said:


"Should this be shown to be effective, we will have another means to prevent the spread of the disease and to save lives, and we will have a big job to do. It is important that as we leave here we all be prepared for a green light that could have a staggering impact on the male population but that will be frankly a lot of trouble to get done."


Surprise support


Clinton also leaped to the defense of the Bush administration's AIDS efforts on Tuesday, saying the United States is spending more to fight HIV than any other government.


Clinton joined Microsoft co-founder Bill Gates in praising President George W. Bush's President's Emergency Program for AIDS Relief, saying it has done more good than harm.


Such support for the conservative Bush government was unexpected at the 16th International Conference on AIDS, a meeting held every two years where activists join researchers, funding agencies and aid groups to discuss the pandemic and, usually, denounce most governments for doing too little.


Clinton, whose foundation negotiates cheaper prices for drugs and HIV tests in developing nations, said PEPFAR has done a lot of good, despite a requirement that 33 percent of prevention funding be spent on abstinence-only programs.


"If you take out the 30 percent of the money that has to be spent on that - the other 70 percent is still a whopping amount of money and more money in federal aid than I think anybody else is getting," Clinton told a plenary session of the conference.


That said, Clinton joined the majority of experts who say abstinence-only programs do not work. Better, he said, are programs that include abstinence counseling as part of a range of options.


Other experts have noted that abstinence-only programs have little meaning in societies where young girls and women are forced into early marriage, forced to have sex, or raped.

Report to moderator   Logged
Blunderov
Archon
*****

Gender: Male
Posts: 3160
Reputation: 8.92
Rate Blunderov



"We think in generalities, we live in details"

View Profile WWW E-Mail
Re:Good Grief!!
« Reply #7 on: 2006-08-17 02:28:16 »
Reply with quote


Quote from: Mermaid on 2006-08-16 11:04:38   

http://www.ynetnews.com/articles/0,7340,L-3291902,00.html >
Clinton: Circumcision - the answer to AIDS

[Blunderov] Certainly not a complete answer to the problem. But it does seem that some STD's are not transmitted or received as much by circumcised men.

Recycling Candida infections can sometimes be eliminated entirely if the male partner undergoes a circumcision. I can attest to this. Having a circumcision at the age of 33 was a very interesting experience, and well worth it, but I don't know that I would care to repeat it.

Best regards
Report to moderator   Logged
Mermaid
Archon
****

Posts: 770
Reputation: 8.66
Rate Mermaid



Bite me!

View Profile
Re:Good Grief!!
« Reply #8 on: 2006-08-17 02:51:08 »
Reply with quote

unfortunately, you can't repeat it even if you want to...foreskins don't regrow.

seriously tho, there is NO evidence that circumcision prevents transmission of HIV/AIDS. why mutilate when it can be solved by wearing a rubber? not stressing this point is clearly cause for concern as this kind of BS news is sure to give people a false security. One study of 2000 kenyans doesnt spring a 'solution'. I find this totally and completely irresponsible.
Report to moderator   Logged
Hermit
Archon
*****

Posts: 4274
Reputation: 8.96
Rate Hermit



Prime example of a practically perfect person

View Profile WWW
Re:Good Grief!!
« Reply #9 on: 2006-08-17 13:13:11 »
Reply with quote

A Word or Two on "Candida"

Candida Albicans is one of the rather large number of completely "normal" (i.e. expected) inhabitants of the human vagina, mouth and rectum as well as the esophagus and the digestive tract. It can sometimes affect the nails (candidal onchomycosis) or the tissue next to the nails (paronychia) as well.

When a moniliasis (a "yeast infection" although Candida Albicans is really a fungus) of the mouth (usually called thrush), sexual organs (properly referred to as vaginalitis moniliasis) or anus and perinium and, or, the surrounding tissues (often seen in infants, aka "nappy rash") occurs, what has really happened is that:  normal flora and fauna that help keep fungi in check have been suppressed (often due to taking antibiotics); the Ph or nutrient level has increased (often due to a hormonal change, usually due to the menstrual cycle, stress or a change in eating habits); an environmental change (not keeping clean enough); or increased loading (from unprotected sex with a partner suffering an irruption, or other transfer cause, e.g. dirty fingers); sufficient to encourage multiplication, the normally controlled colony explodes into a paroxysm of budding.

Ooh says the host, I've been infected. Like somebody with a common cold, they seek for "solutions." Strangely, just about every possible solution tried seems usually to work. In the normal way of things, about two weeks later, the "infection" (or should we not say, irruption?) clears up. The naive host or observer may say "Eureka! (Or Hallelujah!) I'm cured. That fixed the little blighters". And the next time they have the problem, they may attempt the same solution. Unless they are using modern anti-fungal agents, no matter when in the cycle they attempt the solution, it will clear up at about the same rate. This should be seen as a clue to its true nature and their remedy's efficacy. Particularly, as with the common cold, somebody who just "lives with it" also tends to clear up at around the same rate.

Yes, Candida Albicans can "transfer" to guys. But guys normally have some of the same fungus in and around their bodies. Yes, guys can also have a genital irruption - and it is completely true that this, like breast cancer in women with breasts, is indeed more usual in men who have not been genitally mutilated. It is also true that an active irruption in one partner can sometimes trigger an irruption in another - including "ping-pong irruptions" - due to sharing of an increased Candida Albicans loading; but I'm not sure that even under this circumstance, that I would label this particular phenomena as an STD.

Unfortunately, an irruption of Candida Albicans in men sometimes results in triggering penile balanitis. This painful condition is actually a consequence of the immune system recognizing the fungus as a potentially dangerous infection and flooding the area with lymphocytes - with the resulting congestion causing pressure on the nervous tissue - of which the penis is liberally supplied. While historically this was often relieved by circumcision (on the same principle as decapitation prevents recognition of the pain, cutting the nervous tissue away stops the triggering of the pain (though not the source), and the drying of the area due to the circumcision eventually prevents fungal growth; a simple course of treatment with modern anti-fungals will achieve a "cure" for the condition by reducing the fungus back to a level where the normal biota can take care of it. In either case, the real cure is simply to prevent the body from reacting to Candida Albicans loading as a dangerous infection. Which it can be. Like most fungal agents, when the host's immune system is compromised (e.g. HIV/AIDS,  Leukemia, transplant patients) Candida can get out of control inside the body. When Candida Albicans gets into the bloodstream, throat, intestines, and heart valves it can cause severe damage and is extremely difficult to control. Not a good thing, but still not an STD.

Kind Regards

Hermit
« Last Edit: 2006-08-18 12:43:09 by Hermit » Report to moderator   Logged

With or without religion, you would have good people doing good things and evil people doing evil things. But for good people to do evil things, that takes religion. - Steven Weinberg, 1999
Hermit
Archon
*****

Posts: 4274
Reputation: 8.96
Rate Hermit



Prime example of a practically perfect person

View Profile WWW
Re:Good Grief!!
« Reply #10 on: 2006-08-17 14:04:10 »
Reply with quote

The last word should (as usual) be reserved for Monty Python

Sexual Ailments in Monty Python's 'Medical Love Song'

Source: BBC
[Hermit: Due to time pressure, not all links have been transcribed. See the original article.]
   
'Medical Love Song' is from Monty Python's Contractual Obligation Album, released in 1980. With lyrics written by Eric Idle and Graham Chapman (a qualified doctor) and music by Idle and John Du Prez, it is a song that amuses and disgusts in almost equal measures, detailing a whole list of sexual illnesses supposedly shared by the singer with his partner. The original version was shorter than the one presented here, which appeared in full on Python's Monty Python Sings album in 1991. In the reprint of Graham's autobiography, Eric Idle writes:

In October 1989, as Graham lay dying I was editing a collection of Python songs, and had been searching in vain for the original recording of a song Graham and I wrote together called Medical Love Song. I finally found it the day he died, and played it with tears rolling down my cheeks as Graham sang:

    I left my body to science
    But I'm afraid they turned it down.

While a full description of all the ailments described is beyond the scope of this entry, what follows is a blow-by-blow description of the diseases involved; not only to explain to Python fans exactly what they are laughing at, but also as an introduction to some diseases guaranteed to encourage caution.

The First Verse

Inflammation of the foreskin reminds me of your smile
I've had balanital chancroids for quite a little while
I gave my heart to NSU that lovely night in June
I ache for you my darling and I hope you get well soon.


Posthitis, Balanitis, Balanoposthitis

An inflamed foreskin is caused by an infection called posthitis, caused by a yeast or bacterium, and usually manifests as a result of poor hygiene, linked to the Candida fungus - although it can also be transmitted sexually. It can be treated with anti-fungal creams, although repeated infections may leave circumcision as the best option. It can also be bought over the counter in tablet and pessary form - men should note, however, that the pessaries are designed for women and as such are not intended to be taken orally! The fact that the singer is also suffering from balanitis, inflammation of the glans penis[1], implies that he has a slightly more complex condition called balanoposthitis. This often has multiple causes, but the key again is maintaining a good standard of personal hygiene in those hard-to-reach areas.

Chanchroids

This is a largely tropical sexually transmitted disease (STD), which does occasionally occur in Europe and North America, and often appears with other sexual diseases. It forms ulcers, which can manifest anywhere in the genital area - Idle's 'balanital chancroids', on the glans penis, are reputedly the most painful of all. Around 50% of patients recover in time without treatment; those that seek help are generally subjected to a course of several drugs and may treat the ulcers with a saline solution. Presumably this brings an extra edge to the idea of 'rubbing salt into the wounds'.

Non-Specific Urethritis

The first verse is rounded off with a mention of NSU, or non-specific urethritis; 'non-specific' as the organism does not develop in a conventional way. As an inflammation of the urethra[2], it isn't externally obvious; the man may pee a white colour, need to go very regularly or experience burning pain while doing so. Many infections can be the cause of NSU, so although a female may not suffer from the symptoms, she may be carrying the infection that is the cause and, like males, will need antibiotic treatment.

The Second Verse

My penile warts, your herpes, my syphilitic sore,
Your monilial infection; how I miss you more and more
Your Dhobi's itch, my scrumpox; our lovely gonorrhea
At least we both were lying when we said that we were clear!


Genital Warts

Genital warts are transferred by skin contact. Ranging in size from small white lumps to larger growths, they can be found around the whole genital area - not just the genitals themselves - and be warned, as only a small percentage of warts are visible to the naked eye! Sometimes they can be difficult to remove; the warts themselves are carried by a virus which can remain in the body, and it is not uncommon for them to return, requiring further treatment. There are over 20 strains of the virus, known as human papilloma viruses or HPVs; some cause warts and others are linked to cervical cancer, and a couple are responsible for both. There is no statistical link between women that have had genital warts and those who develop cervical cancer; the best way to minimise the chances of the latter is to attend regular smears when invited.

Herpes

Herpes occurs in two forms; Herpes Symplex Virus 1, which usually causes cold sores around the mouth but can also infect the genitalia, and HSV2, which is more likely to infect the genitals. However, as more people indulge in oral sex, both types can be found in both areas! It is the first of Python's diseases that is slightly more commonplace in women than men - 56% of sufferers are female. In fact, herpes is surprisingly commonplace; 70% of the British population have HSV1, and 10% HSV2, according to the Herpes Viruses Association[3]. The first 'outbreak' of the disease is usually the most severe, manifesting itself as sores around the area where the virus infected the body. Often the skin will crack and develop a crust or develop blisters. Herpes remains in nerve cells for life, transporting itself to the skin surface on occasion to produce more virus, and as such it is incurable - although outbreaks tend to become less frequent with time. It can easily be transmitted from person to person through sexual contact, especially as many people have very mild or no symptoms at all, and may not realise they are infected.

Syphilis

Syphilis is a rather nasty disease caused by a bacterium called Treponema pallidum, important and complex enough to require an Entry all of its own. It has a number of symptoms, many of which are similar to those of other diseases, often making it difficult to diagnose and earning it the moniker the great imitator. It is the myriad and often apparently trivial symptoms that make this such a dangerous disease, as it can easily cause death without causing serious ill-effects before. If it can be caught early, it is easy to treat by injecting penicillin into the muscle, but damage caused in the latter stages is irreversible.

If untreated, the disease will develop in four distinct stages:
    [1.] Primary. The first sign of syphilis is a chancre, or shanker, which appears after about three weeks on the part of the body where the bacteria first entered the body. There is rarely any pain or discomfort, and the chancre is often overlooked unless nearby lymph glands in the immune system swell.
    [2.] Secondary. A few weeks after the chancre appears, the secondary stage begins with a rash, usually on the hands and feet. Again, this is unlikely to cause discomfort. Headaches and sore throat are common, and many other symptoms, apparently unrelated, such as fatigue, hair loss or aching joints may exist. Sores in the mouth or on the genitals, if they appear, are highly contagious.
    [3.] Latent. After several weeks, the symptoms of secondary syphilis subside, the patient begins to feel better, and the disease becomes latent. Though symptoms from the secondary stage may return, it almost seems the disease is going away. However, it is merely dormant in the host, who can still spread the disease to sexual partners.
    [4.] Tertiary. If untreated, the carrier will eventually move on to the final stage, which is where the real damage is done. Often fatal, syphilis can affect any part of the body, causing effects as serious and diverse as mental illness, heart failure, blindness and spinal damage.


For more information on the disease, these is an excellent h2g2 Entry on the subject.

Monilial Infection

A monilial infection, also known as monilial vaginitis, is estimated to be the source of around 50% of vaginal infections. It is usually caused by one of those nasty Candida fungi that gave the male singer such problems earlier on. Similarly too, it inflames the female's vagina and can leave a nasty white cheese-like substance clinging to the vaginal wall. Antifungal 'getian of violets' is the most common treatment.

'Dhobi's Itch'

Dhobi's itch[4] is a British colloquial expression, used when in India to describe tinea cruris ringworm. It proliferates in hot, humid climates, and since contaminated laundry is a common way for the fungus to spread, the poor old Indian dhobis - laundrymen - have given their name to the disease. It loves warm, moist parts of the body, especially the groin, where it manifests itself as a rash. It is uncommon in children, and around 75% of cases are in men.

Scrumpox

Scrumpox is another word for impetigo or herpes gladiatorum, and is not actually a sexually transmitted infection at all - like HSV1 and 2, it is spread by skin contact but usually appears on the upper half of the body. It is of particular concern not to the promiscuous, but to rugby players[5] and wrestlers - interestingly, the Latin word gladiatorum literally means 'wrestler-like' - as rough stubble can tear the skin tissue, passing on the disease. The British Medical Journal says:

    Scrumpox is traditionally associated with rugby football; the presence of skin lesions combined with the abrasive effects of facial stubble while scrumming facilitate transmission of infection. Other causal combat sports include judo and wrestling. Infection may also be spread readily by sharing towels or equipment.

It is also a disease that commonly affects children, and is spread by skin-to-skin contact.

Gonorrhea

Gonorrhea, also known as the Clap, is a nasty disease leading to painful discharges from the penis or vagina. Although extremely unpleasant in the early stages, it can quickly get far worse, leading to infertility, joint pain, heart failure and even brain damage. Fortunately, the existence of a h2g2 Entry on the subject means we can be spared an in-depth discussion here.

The Third Verse

Our syphilitic kisses sealed the secret of our tryst
You gave me scrotal pustules with a quick flick of your wrist
Your trichovaginitis sent shivers down my spine
I got snail tracks in my anus when your spirochetes met mine


For information on syphilis, see the relevant section above.

Scrotal Pustules, Genital Sores

A pustule is simply a large spot, common in acne. However, large pustules on the genitalia are often the sign of an STD; often symbolic of chanchroids, syphilis or herpes. Quite how they could be transmitted with a 'quick flick of the wrist' is, as yet, unknown to medicine.

Trichomoniasis

Python's trichovaginitis is likely to be the 'trich' form of vaginitis, correctly called Trichomonas vaginalis. This is an inflammation of the vulva or vagina and is accompanied by a nasty-looking discharge of fluid, varying in colour from pale yellow to lime green. This causes a burning itch in the pubic area, which can be incredibly painful if it comes into contact with urine. Men can carry the causal protozoa in the urethra, but rarely suffer any ill-effects. Unpleasantly, it can survive in warm water, and jacuzzis and spas are a known source of infection.

Spirochetes

These are a small family of worm-like bacteria, a variety of which (Treponema pallidum) causes syphilis.

The Chorus

Gonococcal urethritis, streptococcal balanitis,
Meningomyelitis, diplococcal cephalitis,
Epididymitis, interstitial keratitis,
Syphilitic choroiditis, and anterior uveitis


Gonococcal urethritis is a posh Latin name for gonorrhea, covered above.

Streptococcal Balanitis

This is simply balanitis - as we already know, an inflamed glans penis - which has developed as a result of infection by the Streptococcus bacteria. In defence of the line, however, it does scan well, particularly when sung in a Cockney accent.

Meningomyelitis

This is inflammation of the spinal chord, and at first glance appears out of place in the song. However, it can be a result of the tertiary stage of syphilis, when it's also known as cerebrospinal syphilis or Erb's syphilitic spastic paraplegia - the latter sounding perhaps more like a Dungeons & Dragons spell than a nasty wasting condition. It frequently leads to paralysis.

Diplococcal Cephalitis

Cephalitis is an inflammation of the brain, usually caused by a virus. However, Neisser's diplococcus is the bacterium responsible for gonorrhea, so it is likely that this is referred to as a side-effect of that disease.

Epididymitis

Commonly developing from gonorrhea, this is an inflammation of the epididymis, a long duct at the back of the testicle where mature sperm are stored. It causes severe scrotal pain, urinary problems (consistently needing to go, not being able to pass water or painful peeing), pain up the sides of the body and, not surprisingly, nausea. The main source of infection is from the food poisoning bacteria Escherichia coli.

Interstitial Keratitis

'Affectionately' known as IK, this is quite simply a form of syphilis that concentrates its attacks on the eyes. The patient, on moving to the tertiary syphilitic stage, loses the sight in one eye, and a few months later, in the other.

Syphilitic Choroiditis and Anterior Uveitis

These are taken together, as choroiditis and uveitis are both inflammations of different parts of the uvea, the middle layer of the eyeball (for excellent descriptions and a handy diagram, take a look at the Uveitis Information Group website). The 'anterior' simply to the infection being in the front part of the uveal tract, while the choroid is the back part. It can have many causes, some innocent, but also including syphilis and herpes.

The Fourth and Fifth Verses

My clapped-out genitalia is not so bad for me
As the complete and utter failure every time I try to pee.
My doctor says my buboes are the worst he's ever seen
My scrotum's painted orange and my balls are turning green

My heart is very tender though my parts are awful raw
You might have been infected but you never were a bore
I'm dying from your love, my love, I'm your spirochaetal clown
I've left my body to science but I'm afraid they've turned it down


Fortunately for us (and him, presumably) the singer has by this stage run out of diseases, infections and rehashings of syphilis. Just one to go - and on its own, it's only a symptom.

Buboes

A bubo is a swollen lymph gland, an example of which is the chancre which develops in primary syphilis. They also develop in gonorrhea, as well as in bubonic plague - hence the name.

Avoidance

Well, just don't play the song.

The only way to avoid catching these diseases is to abstain, which takes rather more willpower than many of us are blessed with - and as we have seen, even that is not enough in the case of many of these ailments. Condoms are also effective against most - but not all - of these diseases. Safer sex is the best way to avoid them; if you want to have sex without a condom then go along to a STI clinic and get a check-up together first. All clinics will be happy to do a check-up even if you have no symptoms. Inform yourself of the signs (perhaps through great sites like BBC Health), maintain good hygiene, check yourself regularly for lesions and if in doubt, consult your doctor. The thought of untreated gonorrhea is almost as stomach-churning as the song itself.

1 The bit normally covered by foreskin.
2 The tube inside the penis that expels urine.
3 The implication here is that herpes is very common, rather than that the UK is a hotbed of the disease.
4 Often incorrectly spelt as 'dobie', even by Python.
5 As the name suggests.
Report to moderator   Logged

With or without religion, you would have good people doing good things and evil people doing evil things. But for good people to do evil things, that takes religion. - Steven Weinberg, 1999
Blunderov
Archon
*****

Gender: Male
Posts: 3160
Reputation: 8.92
Rate Blunderov



"We think in generalities, we live in details"

View Profile WWW E-Mail
Re:Good Grief!!
« Reply #11 on: 2006-08-18 07:19:32 »
Reply with quote


Quote from: Hermit on 2006-08-17 14:04:10   
The last word should (as usual) be reserved for Monty Python


[Bl.] Perhaps we could indulge in a bit of Zappa too?

"Joe's Garage
Why Does It Hurt When I Pee?

Shortly after his liaison with the taco stand lady, JOE makes a horrible discovery...

Joe:
Why does it hurt when I pee?
Why does it hurt when I pee?
I don't want no doctor
To stick no needle in me
Why does it hurt when I pee?
I got it from the toilet seat
I got it from the toilet seat
It jumped right up
'N' grabbed my meat
Got it from the toilet seat
My balls feel like a pair of maracas
My balls feel like a pair of maracas
Oh God I probably got the
Gon-o-ka-ka-khackus!
My balls feel like a pair of maracas
Ai-ee-ai-ee-ahhhh!
Why does it
Why does it
Why does it
Why does it hurt...when I
Peeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee? "

[Bl.] Ole!

Another aspect to circumcision is the reduction in sensitivity of the glans. This is not always as bad an idea as it may seem at first sight. Orgasm is undiminished and the fun lasts for longer. IMO.

Best regards



« Last Edit: 2006-08-18 09:30:38 by Blunderov » Report to moderator   Logged
Mermaid
Archon
****

Posts: 770
Reputation: 8.66
Rate Mermaid



Bite me!

View Profile
Re:Good Grief!!
« Reply #12 on: 2006-08-24 00:42:53 »
Reply with quote

http://www.slate.com/id/2148034/

The case for genital mutilation > William Saleton

The 'case' is getting stronger and stronger...you see, the author argues that circumcision=vaccination.

blunderov, it is not the 'fun' aspect that is used to promote circumcision. they are saying that the tranmission of hiv/aids is prevented if one is circumcised. this simply isnt true. just wear a fucking condom.
Report to moderator   Logged
Pages: [1] Reply Notify of replies Send the topic Print 
Jump to:


Powered by MySQL Powered by PHP Church of Virus BBS | Powered by YaBB SE
© 2001-2002, YaBB SE Dev Team. All Rights Reserved.

Please support the CoV.
Valid HTML 4.01! Valid CSS! RSS feed