"We think in generalities, we live in details"
RE: virus: Fear, loathing and the syphillis president.
« on: 2004-10-29 02:16:52 »
[Blunderov] The nonpareil of gonzo journalism speaks. At last.
Ugly, tasteless, terrifying and wild... Count me in
He's been America's most unorthodox political commentator for more than
30 years. But for Dr Hunter S Thompson the Bush presidency is evil
beyond belief - and judgement is nigh
28 October 2004
The genetically vicious nature of presidential campaigns in America is
too obvious to argue with, but some people call it fun, and I am one of
them. Election day - especially when it's a presidential election - is
always a wild and terrifying time for politics junkies, and I am one of
those, too. We look forward to major election days like sex addicts look
forward to orgies. We are slaves to them.
Which is not a bad thing, all in all, for the winners. They are not the
ones who bitch and whine about slavery when the votes are finally
counted and the losers are forced to get down on their knees. No. The
slaves who emerge victorious from these drastic public decisions go
crazy with joy and plunge each other into deep tubs of chilled Cristal
champagne with naked strangers who want to be close to a winner.
That is how it works in the victory business. You see it every time. The
weak suck up to the strong, for fear of losing their jobs and money and
all the fickle power they wielded only 24 hours ago. It is like suddenly
losing your wife and your home in a vagrant poker game, then having to
go on the road with whoremongers and beg for your dinner in public.
Nobody wants to hire a loser. Right? They stink of doom and defeat.
"What is that horrible smell in the office, Tex? It's making me sick."
"That is the smell of a loser, senator. He came in to apply for a job,
but we tossed him out immediately. Sgt Sloat took him down to the
parking lot and taught him a lesson he will never forget."
"Good work, Tex. And how are you coming with my new enemies list? I want
them all locked up. They are scum."
"We will punish them brutally. They are terrorist sympathisers, and most
of them voted against you. I hate those bastards."
"Thank you, Sloat. You are a faithful servant. Come over here and kneel
down. I want to reward you."
That is the nature of high-risk politics. Veni, vidi, vici, especially
among Republicans. It's like the ancient Bedouin saying: "As the camel
falls to its knees, more knives are drawn."
Presidential politics is a vicious business, even for rich white men,
and anybody who gets into it should be prepared to grapple with the
meanest of the mean. The White House has never been seized by timid
warriors. There are no rules, and the roadside is littered with
wreckage. That is why they call it the passing lane. Just ask any
candidate who ever ran against George Bush - Al Gore, Ann Richards, John
McCain - all of them ambushed and vanquished by lies and dirty tricks.
And all of them still whining about it.
That is why George W Bush is President of the United States, and Al Gore
is not. Bush simply wanted it more, and he was willing to demolish
anything that got in his way, including the US Supreme Court. It is not
by accident that the Bush White House (read: Dick Cheney & Halliburton
Inc) controls all three branches of our federal government today. They
are powerful thugs who would far rather die than lose the election in
The Republican establishment is haunted by painful memories of what
happened to Old Man Bush in 1992. He peaked too early, and he had no
response to "It's the economy, stupid." Which has always been the case.
Every GOP administration since 1952 has let the Military-Industrial
Complex loot the Treasury and plunge the nation into debt on the excuse
of a wartime economic emergency. Richard Nixon comes quickly to mind,
along with Ronald Reagan and his ridiculous "trickle-down" theory of US
economic policy. If the rich get richer, the theory goes, before long
their pots will overflow and somehow "trickle down" to the poor, who
would rather eat scraps off the Bush family plates than eat nothing at
all. Republicans have never approved of democracy, and they never will.
It goes back to pre-industrial America, when only white male property
owners could vote.
Things haven't changed much where George W Bush comes from. Houston is a
cruel, crazy town on a filthy river in East Texas with no zoning laws
and a culture of sex, money and violence. It's a shabby, sprawling
metropolis ruled by brazen women, crooked cops and super-rich pansexual
cowboys who live by the code of the West - which can mean just about
anything you need it to mean, in a pinch.
Houston is also the unnatural home of two out of the last three
presidents of the United States of America, for good or ill. The other
one was a handsome, sex-crazed boy from next-door Arkansas, which has no
laws against any deviant practice not specifically forbidden in the New
Testament, including anal incest and public cunnilingus with farm
Back in 1948, during his first race for the US Senate, Lyndon Johnson
was running about 10 points behind, with only nine days to go. He was
desperate. And it was just before noon on a Monday, they say, when he
called his equally depressed campaign manager and told him to call a
press conference for just before lunch on a slow news day and accuse his
high-riding opponent, a pig farmer, of having routine carnal knowledge
of his sows, despite the pleas of his wife and children.
His campaign manager was shocked. "We can't say that, Lyndon," he
supposedly said. "You know that it isn't true."
"Of course it's not!" Johnson barked. "But let's make the bastard deny
Johnson - a Democrat, like Bill Clinton - won that election by fewer
than 100 votes, and after that he was home free. He went on to rule
Texas and the US Senate for 20 years and to be the most powerful vice
president in the history of the United States. Until now.
Armageddon came early for George Bush this year, and he was not ready
for it. His long-awaited showdowns with John Kerry turned into a series
of embarrassments that broke his nerve and demoralised his closest
campaign advisers. They knew he would never recover, no matter how many
votes they could steal for him in Florida, where the presidential
debates were closely watched and widely celebrated by millions of Kerry
supporters who suddenly had reason to feel like winners.
Kerry came into October as a five-point underdog with almost no chance
of winning three out of three rigged confrontations with a treacherous
little freak like George Bush. But the debates are over now, and the
victor was John Kerry every time. He steamrollered Bush and left him for
Did you see Bush on TV, trying to debate? Jesus, he talked like a donkey
with no brains at all. The tide turned early, in Coral Gables, when Bush
went belly up less than halfway through his first bout with Kerry, who
hammered poor George into jelly. It was pitiful... I almost felt sorry
for him, until I heard someone call him "Mister President", and then I
Karl Rove, the President's political wizard, felt even worse. There is
angst in the heart of Texas today, and panic in the bowels of the White
House. Rove has a nasty little problem, and its name is George Bush. The
president failed miserably from the instant he got onstage with John
Kerry. He looked weak and dumb. Kerry beat him like a gong in Coral
Gables, then again in St Louis and Tempe. That is Rove's problem. His
candidate is a weak-minded frat boy who cracks under pressure in front
of 60 million voters.
Bush signed his own death warrant in the opening round, when he finally
had to speak without his teleprompter. It was a Cinderella story brought
up to date in Florida that night - except this time, the false prince
turned back into a frog.
Immediately after the first debate ended, I called Muhammad Ali at his
home in Michigan, but whoever answered said the champ was laughing so
hard that he couldn't come to the phone. "The debate really cracked him
up," he chuckled. "The champ loves a good ass-whuppin'. He says Bush
looked so scared to fight, he finally just quit and laid down."
This year's first presidential debate was such a disaster for George
Bush that his handlers had to be crazy to let him get in the ring with
John Kerry again. Yet Karl Rove let it happen, and we can only wonder
why. But there is no doubt that the president has lost his nerve, and
his career in the White House is finished. No mas.
Indeed. The numbers are weird today, and so is this dangerous election.
The time has come to rumble, to inject a bit of fun into politics.
That's exactly what the debates did. John Kerry looked like a winner,
and it energised his troops. Voting for Kerry is starting to look like
serious fun for everyone except poor George, who now looks like a loser.
That is fatal in a presidential election.
I look at elections with the cool and dispassionate gaze of a
professional gambler, especially when I'm betting real money on the
outcome. Contrary to most conventional wisdom, I see Kerry with five
points as a recommended risk. Kerry will win this election, if it
happens, by a bigger margin than Bush finally gouged out of Florida in
2000. That was about 46 per cent, plus five points for owning the US
Supreme Court - which seemed to equal 51 per cent. Nobody really
believed that, but George W Bush moved into the White House anyway.
It was the most brutal seizure of power since Hitler burned the
Reichstag in 1933 and declared himself the new boss of Germany. Karl
Rove is no stranger to Nazi strategy, if only because it worked for a
while, and it was sure fun for Hitler. But not for long. He ran out of
oil, the whole world hated him, and he liked to gobble pure crystal
biphetamine and stay awake for eight days in a row with his maps and
bombers and his dope-addled general staff.
They all loved the whiff. It is the perfect drug for war, as long as you
are winning, and Hitler thought he was king of the hill forever. He had
created a new master race, and every one of them worshipped him. They
were fanatics. That was 66 years ago, and things are not much different
today. We still love war.
George Bush certainly does. In four short years he has turned our
country from a prosperous nation at peace into a desperately indebted
nation at war. But so what? He is the President of the United States,
and you're not. Love it or leave it.
BULLETIN: KERRY WINS GONZO ENDORSEMENT; DR THOMPSON JOINS DEMOCRAT IN
CALLING BUSH "THE SYPHILIS PRESIDENT".
"Four more years of George Bush will be like four more years of
syphilis," the famed author said yesterday at a hastily called press
conference near his home in Woody Creek, Colorado.
"Only a fool or a sucker would vote for a dangerous loser like Bush. He
hates everything we stand for, and he knows we will vote against him in
November." Thompson, well known for the eerie accuracy of his political
instincts, went on to denounce Ralph Nader as "a worthless Judas goat
with no moral compass."
"I endorsed John Kerry a long time ago," he said, "and I will do
everything in my power, short of roaming the streets with a meat hammer,
to help him be the next president of the United States."
Which is true. I said all those things, and I will say them again. Of
course I will vote for John Kerry. I have known him for 30 years as a
good man with a brave heart - which is more than even the President's
friends will tell you about George W Bush, who is also an old
acquaintance from the white-knuckle days of yesteryear. He is hated all
over the world, including large parts of Texas, and he is taking us all
down with him. Bush is a natural-born loser with a filthy-rich daddy who
pimped his son out to rich oil-mongers. He hates music, football and
sex, and he is no fun at all.
I voted for Ralph Nader in 2000, but I won't make that mistake again.
The joke is over for Nader. He was funny once, but now he belongs to the
dead. Nader is a fool, as is anybody who votes for him in November -
with the obvious exception of professional Republicans who have paid big
money to turn him into a world-famous Judas goat. Nader is so desperate
that he's paying homeless people to gather signatures to get him on the
ballot. In Pennsylvania, the petitions he submitted contained tens of
thousands of phoney signatures, including Fred Flintstone, Mickey Mouse
and John Kerry. A judge dumped Ralph from the ballot there, calling it
"the most deceitful and fraudulent exercise ever perpetrated upon this
But they will keep his name on the ballot in the long-suffering
Hurricane State, which is ruled by the President's younger brother, Jeb,
who also wants to be the next president of the United States. In 2000,
when they sent Jim Baker to Florida, I knew it was all over. In that
election, 97,488 people voted for Nader in Florida, and Gore lost the
state by 537 votes. You don't have to be from Texas to understand the
moral of that story. It's like being out-coached in the Super Bowl. Only
losers play fair, and all winners have blood on their hands.
Back in June, when John Kerry was beginning to feel like a winner, we
had a quick rendezvous on a rain-soaked runway in Aspen, Colorado, where
he was scheduled to meet a harem of wealthy campaign contributors. I
told him that Bush's vicious goons in the White House are perfectly
capable of assassinating Nader and blaming it on him. His staff laughed,
but the Secret Service men didn't. Kerry suggested I might make a good
running mate, and we reminisced about trying to end the Vietnam War in
That was the year I first met him, at a riot on that elegant little
street in front of the White House. He was yelling into a bullhorn and I
was trying to throw a dead rat over a black-spike fence and on to the
President's lawn. We were angry and righteous in those days, and there
were millions of us. We kicked two chief executives out because they
were stupid warmongers. We conquered Lyndon Johnson and we stomped on
Richard Nixon - which wise people said was impossible, but so what? It
was fun. We were warriors then, and our tribe was strong like a river.
That river is still running. All we have to do is get out and vote,
while it's still legal, and we will wash those crooked warmongers out of
the White House.
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