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Topic: RE: virus: Redefinitions (Read 844 times) |
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Blunderov
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"We think in generalities, we live in details"
  
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RE: virus: Redefinitions
« on: 2004-10-08 14:01:04 » |
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[Blunderov] Once again, The Washington Post published its yearly contest
in which readers are asked to supply alternate meanings for various
words.
The winners are...
1. Coffee (n.), a person who is coughed upon.
2. Flabbergasted (adj.), appalled over how much weight you have
gained.
3. Abdicate (v.), to give up all hope of ever having a flat stomach.
4. Esplanade (v.), to attempt an explanation while drunk.
5. Willy-nilly (adj.), impotent.
6. Negligent (adj.), describes a condition in which you
absent-mindedly answer the door in your nightgown.
7. Lymph (v.), to walk with a lisp.
8. Gargoyle (n.), an olive-flavoured mouthwash.
9. Flatulence (n.), the emergency vehicle that picks you up after you
are run over by a steamroller.
10. Balderdash (n.), a rapidly receding hairline.
11. Testicle (n), a humorous question on an exam.
12. Rectitude (n), the formal, dignified demeanour assumed by a
proctologist immediately before he examines you.
13. Oyster (n.), a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddish
expressions.
14. Pokemon (n.), a Jamaican proctologist.
15. Frisbeetarianism (n.), the belief that, when you die your soul
goes up on the roof and gets stuck there.
16. Circumvent (n.), the opening in the front of boxer shorts.
Best Regards.
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LenKen
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Mi caca es su caca.
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RE: virus: Redefinitions
« Reply #1 on: 2004-10-15 18:43:28 » |
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Ha! These made me chuckle:
• Rectitude (n), the formal, dignified demeanour assumed by a proctologist immediately before he examines you.
• Pokemon (n.), a Jamaican proctologist.
• Oyster (n.), a person who sprinkles his conversation with Yiddish expressions.
Hmm, I suppose I’m a bit of an oyster—not to mention a schlemiel, schlimazel, schmuck, and schmegegge. . . .
_____________
Blunderov <squooker@mweb.co.za> wrote:
[Blunderov] Once again, The Washington Post published its yearly contest
in which readers are asked to supply alternate meanings for various
words. . . .
’Tis better to have loved and lost
than never to have known what it’s like
to have sex with someone besides yourself. —LenKen
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