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Blunderov
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"We think in generalities, we live in details"
  
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The Zen of Sarcasm
« on: 2008-07-29 03:40:27 » |
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[Blunderov] One of those lists that do the e-mail rounds from time to time. Obviously I found this one quite amusing.
The Zen of Sarcasm
1. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much leave me alone.
2. The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt and leaky tire.
3. Its always darkest before dawn. So if you're going to steal your neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.
4. Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.
5. Always remember that you're unique. Just like everyone else.
6. Never test the depth of the water with both feet.
7. If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.
8. Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes.
That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.
9. If at first you don't succeed, skydiving is probably not for you.
10. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.
11. If you lend someone $20 and never see that person again, it was probably a wise investment.
12. If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.
13. Some days you're the bug; some days you're the windshield.
14. Everyone seems normal until you get to know them.
15. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it in half and put it back in your pocket.
16. A closed mouth gathers no foot.
17. Duct tape is like 'The Force.' It has a light side and a dark side, and it holds the universe together.
18. There are two theories to arguing with women. Neither one works.
19. Generally speaking, you aren't learning much when your lips are moving.
20. Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.
21. Never miss a good chance to shut up.
22. Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.
[Bl.] A gratuitous addition of my own.
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Blunderov
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"We think in generalities, we live in details"
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Re:The Zen of Sarcasm
« Reply #1 on: 2008-07-29 03:54:43 » |
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[Blunderov] More "true zen sayings" (Thank you Frank Zappa).
www.blastfishing.com
The Aphorisms of Zen Master This
Institutions are designed to frustrate the individual from getting what he wants. We're taught to be patient, to ask, to pay our dues, but the prize invariably goes to the one who takes without asking.
The greatest hope for humanity lies in the fact that the institutional mind is never as sharp or as wise as the individual mind.
There's big money in helping people avoid facing reality and/or responsibility.
People will pay a lot for the privilege of being lied to convincingly.
People often need an authority figure to tell them what they already know.
A central problem in human nature: the urge to take (or delegate taking of) action, regardless of the likelihood of meaningful results.
One can't change other people; one can only change others' comfort level for resisting change.
Organizations amplify the personalities of their leaders.
Our capacity for self-delusion seems to increase with age, especially in the perceived importance of our work.
Most of the things people "know" about the world comes from their imaginations.
Television gives us the vicarious experience of others' successes so we don't have to experience our own.
Art is a bridge between intellect and emotion.
The zealot's worldview is invariably a reflection of himself. The reason there are so few leaders who are men of peace is that there are so few men at peace.
Given the opportunity, most people will put "doing what they should" ahead of "doing what they must."
Let people talk long enough, and they'll usually talk themselves into doing what you wanted them to do.
You can choose to not let others' words hurt you. You can't choose to not let your own words hurt you, but you can choose better words.
The achievement of great material success requires an unlimited capacity for self-delusion and rationalization.
Normal people don't make headlines.
Reality, and sanity, lie on the thin line between denial (not seeing what is there) and paranoia (seeing what is not there).
Many a lifetime is wasted between "good enough" and "perfect."
See the humanity and pathos in your enemy's eyes and you will never be intimidated.
Credibility depends in part on the alignment of what we appear to be with what we believe we are. We are distrustful of those whose outward appearance doesn't fit with their self-image.
Commitment is usually inversely proportional to objectivity.
It's not about whether the glass is half full or half empty; it's about whether it's filling up or emptying out.
If you can choose to be just one thing, be genuine.
As much as possible, approach every moment of life with a sense of humor.
Having a more qualified opinion doesn't automatically make a person right.
One can always find people who know the answers; the more important thing is to know the questions.
20% of one's time, well spent, will generate 80% of one's enjoyment of life.
Expediency is the enemy of truth and justice.
A person's greatest and rarest blessing: the love of a good woman/man.
The biggest problem with becoming an enlightend, self-empowered person is that most people couldn't handle it.
The first rule for being successful by conventional standards is not to question success by conventional standards.
We are all funnels of our experience.
The three great struggles of the individual: Identity - Who am I (against consumerism)?; Meaning - What am I (against nihilism)?, and Reality - What is true (against cognitive dissonance)?
Seek to attain and maintain momentum, however little, in the things you most want to do.
Life becomes so much richer when our eyes are opened to the world of ideas.
Most ideas aren't worth an entire book.
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Fritz
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Re:The Zen of Sarcasm
« Reply #2 on: 2008-07-29 13:53:20 » |
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Quote:| [Blunderov]Many a lifetime is wasted between "good enough" and "perfect." |
This will be my 'reson detra' to get me through the rest of this week of work place silliness
Thx .... wonderful posts and a thoughtful diversion.
Cheers
Fritz
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Where there is the necessary technical skill to move mountains, there is no need for the faith that moves mountains -anon-
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